DON'T HATE ME!!!

[smiley.]

Okay, PUH - LEASE don't judge me forever...
Well, I am a teenager...practically. I've decided to write one of those own stories of mine, one with the cliques and everything. Here I will post the charries, and then within the next hour I'll post the first part of the first chapter.

Girls

Maran ::
She's the leader of them all. Maran is popular, dominant, and a natural born leader, but she can insult you to tears faster than you can say: 'Shopping at Target isn't lame!'
Her father just sold his business about three years ago, so Maran is simply the face of rich at Abundant Glory, the boarding school that she is beginning to attend. Of course, she'd never go without her best friend, Bryce...
Ha, yeah right.

Bryce ::
Bryce is the loser, and everyone in the group picks on her. Maran seems to hate her the most, because well...she shops at Target and Dillards. Abercrombie what? But what no one knows is Bryce is even more rich than Maran, but she prefers to keep that a secret. If she had a makeover, she'd be better than Maran.
And with a little help from Jason, that might just happen.

Caddy ::
Her name says it all. Caddy is rich and in love with Juicy Couture, but she is...well, a kiss-up. She hates everyone in the group except Maran, who she constantly kisses up to. One day she hopes to run the group, but that's not going to happen any time soon.
Unless her plan to crush some Mare folds out.

Keily ::
2 + 2 = Cookie
She's seventeen like everyone else in the group, but she's got the brains of a mediocre toaster. She is so ditzy, but she's hot. Guys fall for her cutosity, but soon discover how stupid she really is...and how stupid they were to go out with her.

Ariana ::
Ariana is h - o - t, HOT. With her mexican heritage, mysterious dark green eyes and shoulder-length, straight cinnamon-coloured hair, she's delicious to boys. She's incredibly rude as well, which may be why Maran seems to love her so much. She's got undivided loyalty, but no one knows that Maran has a younger brother.
Who Arianna just happens to be dating.

Boys

Jason ::
He's the leader, just like Maran. Many have a crush on him, including Maran. But if Maran has a crush on him, you know it's paws off. Unfortunately, Bryce didn't get this little memo and she has a crush on him too.
Jason wonders who the new girl is who appears two months into the year - Bryce, and why everyone calls her ugly. I mean, who says that a T - shirt so tight it shows your belly button with a pic of a belly button on it isn't cute?

Chris ::
Maran's younger brother, he's fourteen instead of seventeen.
That says it all.
All he ever wears is a white t - shirt and shorts, whatever color the shorts may be. But he looks hot in whatever he wears, which is why all the girls find him irresistable. But what if one of Maran's friends dates him behind her back?

Carson ::
They call him Car.
He's obsessed with girls, he kisses all of them...yada yada. He wants to be in every activity the girls are doing, but he thinks himself as so cool.
Though some girls fall for his charm.

Brady ::
The loser, just like Bryce. He's incredibly sweet, but who's this new guy? He doesn't look a thing like Bryce, but they happen to be twins...well, fraternal twins. If he weren't so cute, it'd be really obvious he was related to Bryce. The thing is, if Bryce just wore a little blush and lip gloss, well there you go.

Tyler ::
The quiet, soft, sweet one. He's an artist, he uses his charm to make girls fall in love with him. Most call him Ty, just their little petname for him. Well, not many really know anything about him...he doesn't talk that much. He's aloof and mysterious...

[smiley.]

[ chapter. one]

"You do realize your daughter has just broken the law?" The flight attendant said, a snarl upon her face and fury flashing in her eyes.
Maran's father nodded, sighing and pulling his hair back to show he was very stressed, flashing her a look that said plainly and simply: 'You are so grounded.'
Maran groaned and glanced at the flight attendant, unable to supress a muffled snicker. She had a german hairstyle - kind of like Princess Lea. You know, the braid buns? Yeah, cherry - red lipstick and those simply revolting outfits that they were forced against their will to wear.
Ew.
Suddenly she was pushed away to her father's side and she heard her much shorter fourteen year old brother laugh in her ear.
"You are so busted, what was this about anyway?"
She spoke out of the corner of her mouth, knowing she could tell her brother the real answer that he father wouldn't think was some nonsense and put her on lockdown...no, she was going to her first year of boarding school, Abundant Glory. Yes, this would be most awesome. But she'd heard that Bryce girl was moving from...uggh, Vermont. Disgusting.
"Well, there was this Norwegian guy flying back home...oh boy, he was so hot, I got his number and his name! Havvard...oh boy, think he'll love a girl like me?" She twirled around in her tutu over jeans with a whole in the knee, and a jean jacket ending at her waist. He stared at her chest, eyebrows raised.
"Who wouldn't?"
She slapped him and her father pulled her aside, hissing through gritted teeth. The flight lady had walked away, and Maran could finally breath fresh air. Fashionable air.
"Maran, this is the third time this has happened! What is it for this time, some hot guy?"
Maran's eyes widened at how he knew, but no. She would play it cool. "Well, father of mine, I was...I was desperately in need to find out about this Norwegian culture, and this very nice girl named...Havvarina came and told me that...that she wanted to learn about my culture. Purely school stuff, dad."
He moaned, pulled his face down to reveal his very hidden wrinkles (due to face lifts).
"Just don't let it happen again."
Maran smiled and nodded, grabbing her suitcase and running to her car, ignoring Chris that was straying behind her at a slower pace. She was more excited than he'd ever be.
She hopped into her BMW convertable and whipped out her cellphone, starting up the car and flooring it.
"Hey Cad, whatcha doin'?" She asked, putting on her large brown, sparkle-specked sunglasses and turning a corner sharply, heading for her first day at Glory High.
I mean, who'd really call it Abundant Glory High? Puh - lease.


GAHH! I need to know...you guys like it?

[..::Breezy::..]

xDxD
I loves it you need to right more...NOW
Can't wait for the next part.

[smiley.]

Really? THANKS! awww XP

[Pessimistic One]

Not bad.
If I was more interested in this kind of thing, I'd be saying things in the genre of "Awesome!"
But I'm not sadly.
Though, it is good, honestly.

[smiley.]

O.O
Wow...two
If I get three, I'll post the second part ^^

[kittywinkins]

Hmmm..
well, since I'm sick and pished tonight, I'm going to be a critic.. sorry!

If I understood the plotline better, I might like the story better, but as it is...

My little mole-sized brain has a lot of trouble understanding what's going on, and, for a lot of readers, if it's not clear as day, they're not going to get hooked.
If the story's hard to understand, they won't like it.

The characters aren't too bad, though I might suggest tweaking the personalities to get a bit more of a variety of people.

It sounds like something my friend Molly would write... except she'd make it Naruto somehow. XD

I liked the characters all and all, though... there's someone on my swim team named Bryce, only he's a boy, not a girl.
And he's evil. He's trying to murder my eyeballs.

Kelly sounds like a mix between Molly(Don't tell her I said that.. ) and a girl who USED to be on my swim team....

[| | Fudgey | |]

XXXDD
It made me laugh - but like Stormy, the plot-line is not too clear.
But it is good....^^

[ask]

I absolutely hate it. -shoe'd-
You are a good author, Smiley, your work is spectacular. But this stuff doesn't really click with me. I dunno. I've seen way too many Clique role-plays, and I dislike the whole thing, pretty much.
Yeah, just don't listen to me. =D

[kittywinkins]

-isn't listening-
Huh? Did somebody say something?

[| | Fudgey | |]

XXXDD
Frosty - at least it's better than this:

A loud alarm went of, and a soft moan escaped a 17 year olds lips from where she lay in her bed. She rolled over and got up, yawning as she did so. She walked up to the mirror and examined herself. slender biody, tan skin tone, beautiful mid-back blonde hair, sparkling blue eyes, she was quite pretty, but she really could care less. She walked to the shower and came back out wearing ~c~
A pink hollister shirt and a pair of jean short shorts. Some may pin her as preppy and popular, but she wasn't a snob. Ok she was a little preppy and she was popular, but in a good way. Her name is Trinity Gold and she's a senior and 17 years old. She;s loyal, loving, sweet, outgoing, but has an attitude so don't get on her bad side. ~c~
her hair was up in a high pony tail and it bounced around as she ran down the stairs, grabbing her pink hollister tote bag as she ran out the door, yelling bye to her mom. She ran intyo her car and raced to school, even though she wasn't late, she liked to be early alot of the time.

And:

candy rose from bed. she puled her long straight blonde blue tipped hair into a pont tail. she went to the bathroom and brushed her pearly white teeth. she pulled on a tight fitting tank top that showed her figure. then she put on her riped jeans.she put alittle eyelinner on and alittle mascara her blue eyes matched her tips. she was gorgeuos. candy passed her mom in the kitchen and told her bye. she hoped in her honda and drove to her school.
But then - the same person posted this:

candy saw trinity. "hey gurly!!" candy called to her and whent and kissed her on the cheek. "how was your weekend?"

*begins to sweat*

[kittywinkins]

-glares-

First off... she spelled girly wrong!

Second off... Don't you DARE use MY nick-name on other people, lady!!! XD

[| | Fudgey | |]

It's sickening isn't it.

'she was quite pretty, but she really could care less.'

She couldn't care less.
*rolls eyes*
That's why she was looking in the mirror was it!

[/center]

[ask]

xDDD
HELL YEAH DESPIES :U

[smiley.]

WARNING: LOTS OF FRENCH IN NEXT POST

We better started the d**ned roleplay soon, this is annoying the nuts out of me. This hiatus as gotten me ten BILLION times more literate, and I don't have THIS d**ned site to write a d**ned thing on.
What.the.hell